So far in this three-part series, I have debunked two of the three biggest lies about anger, which most people unfortunately believe are true:
Anger Lie #1: Anger is directly and solely caused by things outside of us…people doing stupid/bad/wrong stuff;
Anger Lie #2: “That’s just the way I am (i.e., if I am prone to getting angry now, I will always be that way).”
Today, I want to expose the third big lie:
Anger Lie #3: There are only two ways to deal with anger—a) express it; or b) suppress it.
Option Three
There is actually a third option for dealing with anger—just stop getting angry in the first place, or learn how to make your angry feelings quickly go away whenever they occur.
If you don’t react with anger anymore, there will be nothing for you to have to decide whether to express or suppress.
Your anger will be gone…eliminated…not in your body anymore.
The problem with this third option is that it only becomes available when you know how to identify and deal with the internal causes of your anger (see Anger Lie #1).
Most people, however, never learn how to do this. So for them, the other two options appear to be the only ones available. And they are the only ones most experts talk about.
I’ve spent the past 40 years using the third option over and over again. And I keep getting better and better at it.
So if you want to have a life where you no longer frequently get angry at your spouse, angry at your kids, angry at the news, angry at your boss or co-workers, angry at your neighbors, angry at the government, etc., you can have this type of life it you want it.
And…if you are willing to learn how to identify the internal causes of your anger, you can then use this knowledge to make anger quickly disappear whenever you want.
Just remember these three things:
- Anger is NOT caused by the things you see that disturb you (it is caused by things you don’t see that become triggered inside your brain and body).
- If you get angry easily, or have been angry all your life, you don’t have to continue that way. You can learn how to eliminate most of your anger, and it only takes 1 hour a week for ten short weeks.
- Forget about expressing or suppressing your anger. When you learn how to master the internal causes of your anger, you won’t have that problem anymore.
Imagine how different your life would be if most of your anger was entirely gone.
Your sleep would be better.
Your relationships would be stronger and if you’re married you’d be less likely to get divorced.
You’ll feel more loving and caring toward the key people in your life.
Your mind will be clear and you’ll walk around with more calmness, peace, and serenity.
You kids might have a chance to grow up with more emotional intelligence and self-control.
How you feel about yourself in general will be greatly improved.
Please think about all these benefits you could start enjoying in just a few short weeks.
And if you want to learn how to get rid of your anger problems, once and for all, reach out to me by email at: doc(at)docorman.com and we can set up a time to talk.